Showing posts with label weddings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label weddings. Show all posts

Monday, December 27, 2010

For Natalie & Benjamin: A Swan-Themed Wedding.

By now you've probably heard the exciting news that Natalie Portman and Benjamin Millipeid, the Black Swan pair who've been our "crush of the moment" for too many moments now (see sidebar), are pregnant and engaged.
a photoshopped imagining of their wedding cake
top from The Film Experience.

There's no exact word on when either of the blessed events (baby & wedding) are to occur though hundreds of thousands of years of human history tell us that the genetically lucky baby, certain to possess both dark haired beauty and physical grace, is coming in 2011.

We immediately tweeted advocating for a swan-themed wedding. Which is an obvious joke but come on. Swan has to be a common theme for weddings anyway and the possibilities are endless. Here are some other great suggestions from friends @jigsawlounge, @joereid and @moviedork18 on twitter.


I told Joe Reid that Timothy Hutton (Beautiful Girls) has to share that duty with Jean Reno (The Professional) if we're going there. But we shouldn't go there. That said, it does cause the mind to wander into Natalie's large filmography for wedding ideas. I still haven't figured out a way to work Clive Owen (Closer) in. Moviedork's comment made me giggle because it reminded me that Black Swan isn't the first time Natalie has had doubles. Remember those Queen Amidala decoys in the Star Wars prequels?!


He's sleeping with Natalie Portman and you're not.
The future Mr. Natalie Portman, choreographer/dancer/actor Benjamin Millipeid.
 But we digress...

Congratulations to the happy couple.


What would you suggest for Natalie's wedding? How would you work her filmography into the nuptials?
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Saturday, August 28, 2010

The Wizard of Link

Journalistic Skepticism What are the 20 Best Movie Weddings? I'm surprised the AFI hasn't made this list yet.
Mind of a Suspicious Kind looks back over Danny Boyle's filmography prior to the release of 127 Hours
Totally Looks Like Miss Hattie (Despicable Me) = Dolores Umbridge. Huh. I do see it now.
Movies Kick Ass compares The Wizard of Oz with... Andrei Tarkovsky's Stalker?


Self Styled Siren
has a really interesting post on the Shirley Temple / John Ford film Wee Willie Winkie (1937) and...
Self Styled Siren ...another post on the attendant hulabaloo at the time by way of controversial critic/ screenwriter/ novelist Graham Greene who called wee Temple "a fancy little piece" in a review that prompted litigation.
Coming Soon First photos from the upcoming 647th film adaptation of The Three Musketeers (2011). This one stars Mads Mikkelsen and Milla Jovovich.
Antagony & Ecstasy reviews Cairo Time. I love this bit.
Which is an extremely good reason why you should never let a plot synopsis be the sole reason you choose your movies (whereas choosing them because of the lead actress - now that's just good sense).
Total Film has been surveying the movie blog landscape. I'm happy to be included on page 3 of their "another 600 movie blogs" but my goodness... 1200 is a lot of linkage with no real gain for anyone right? I mean you can't exactly list it in your bio. It's not like "Declared one of the top one thousand two hundred movie blogs!" is much of a blurb. But I kid. It's nice to be included. What's scary is that's probably only scratching the surface of all the movie blogs in the world.

offscreen
Wall Street Journal on "Judy Garland Lost Tracks"
Playbill on "Judy Garland Lost Tracks." Ummm... how had I missed this news? Seriously. Must have now. Either my brain is a sieve or the internet is because how are people totally discussing this and I didn't even know about it?! Argh. More Judy = yes.
Mighty God King "we need a human behavior patch" See, complainers? I'm not the only movie blogger who sometimes has to let off a little political steam. If you're not sometimes angry about things going on in this world, ur doin it wrong.
Parabasis "let freedom ring" another fine post on the anniversary of MLK's historic speech.
Boy Culture on last week's Scissor Sisters concert. I was there. T'was so fun, sexy, energetic, crazy, etcetera.
OMG Blog catches up with Björk. We hadn't checked in with her in awhile and we're going to Iceland soon. Yay.
The Film Doctor reads the latest horror novel The Shallows: What the Internet Is Doing To Our Brains.

Monday, August 16, 2010

Madonna & Sean

The definitive couple of the 80s?


It was 25 years ago today that Madonna and Sean Penn were married in Malibu. It was Madonna's birthday (she was turning 27). Sean's birthday was the following day (he was turning 25). She was the new queen of pop ("Dress You Up", the final hit single from Like a Virgin was hitting the charts) and he was the critics darling of young actors, consistently winning praise for both his comedy work (Fast Times at Ridgemont High) and drama (The Falcon and the Snowman)... Oscar voters, often slow on the draw, waited another 10 years to nominate him.

Paparazzi helicopters descending on their wedding like an invading army. The following year their movie collaboration Shanghai Surprise was released. Critics swarmed like an angry hive. Whenever paparazzi bugged Madonna, Sean raged like a...

Well you get the point. What a ruckus they always caused.

Their marriage didn't last but their solo fame sure did. Sean Penn won his second Oscar just 18 months ago and Madonna is, well, Madonna. They'll still be talking about her in the 2085. She's currently in London filming W.E. (see previous post).

Madonna arrives at her 52nd birthday party a couple of days ago

Each decade gets a few defining celebrity pairs, don't you think? Who would you say the definitive couples are now? Obviously Brad & Angie, but who else. Which celebrity couple takes up too much of your mental real estate?
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Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Meryl Streep "The Immoral Psychotic Promiscuous One"

Streep at 60, A Retrospective
Previously: Julia, The Deer, 1978 Oscars


Sadie, Sadie (Un)married Lady
One of the fascinating things about old movies is the snapshots they take of their own time. Even in period pieces you can see the (then) modernity of the time period it was made in faintly stamped... a bit of reverse pentimento if you will. The Seventies might be the very best decade for cultural snapshots since it seems as if a large percentage of filmmakers were excited about capturing their own times rather than obsessing over eras gone by or creating imaginary worlds. That's arguably a naive modern perspective on the Seventies based on the films that endured but it feels like the truth.

Troubled marriages have been around since the sacred institution was invented. Naturally they've also been a part of cinema since its invention. What is Sunrise: A Tale of Two Humans (1927) for example but a portrait of a marriage in crisis? Troubled marriages were and are a cinematic mainstay but DIVORCE was something like a freshly hot topic in the 70s. The times they had been a-changing with women's lib, the sexual revolution, rising divorce rates. For a brief fascinating moment, Meryl Streep seemed to embody all of this. She was Bitter Icy Emasculating Ex-Wife and (stated more generously) The Liberated Lady.

Isaac Davis (Woody Allen): Don't write this book. It's a humiliating experience.
Jill Davis (Meryl Streep): It's an honest account of our breakup.
Isaac: Everybody who knows us is going to know everything.
Jill: Look at you, you're so threatened.
Isaac: I'm not threatened. Of the two of us I wasn't the immoral psychotic promiscuous one.

I hope I didn't leave out anything.
Linda from The Deer Hunter, tearfully waiting for men to solve her, would have been confounded by Streep's 1979 women. Just as Meryl was coming into her own stardom, she created three far more liberated women. The highlight for some was her angry divorced lesbian Jill Davis in Woody Allen's Manhattan with her 'suffering-this-fool' superiority and her deadpan catchphrase "It's an honest account of our marriage". She also played 'the other woman', a career girl in the political drama The Seduction of Joe Tynan (I couldn't locate a copy so I can't comment so specifically there). Most famously, she won the Oscar playing the aggressively self-actualizing Joanna Kramer in Kramer Vs. Kramer.

Kramer Vs. Kramer opens with a closeup on Meryl's teary face, her wedding ring facing the viewer. As succinct first images go, it's damn impressive. Joanna is telling her young son she loves him but this isn't just any bedtime tuck in. She's choking back tears. Joanna, we learn, is hopelessly depressed. She's about to pull a Laura Brown and leave her young son behind to find herself. Her workaholic husband Ted (Dustin Hoffman) arrives home shortly thereafter still buzzing from his latest work triumph and talking a mile a minute. He's so busy that he fails to even notice that his wife has packed her bags and is wiggling her keys at him, announcing her departure. He hasn't even looked at her or if he has, he hasn't truly seen her. Maybe not for a long time.

In his defense, she does blend in.

Joanna Kramer's life is all beige. She must escape it.

The life she is leading is not a life she can continue to lead. She knows she's a shell of a woman and an incomplete person. Joanna's departure is one of the most exquisitely rendered scenes in Streep's filmography. It begins very sadly and sympathetically in her child's bedroom. As the weight of what she's doing hits the audience, Streep ices over, telegraphing both her hostility towards the husband she doesn't love and her own numbing survivalist impulses: She's leaving her boy behind... ready the anaesthesia!

As the war between the Kramers erupts outside their apartment, Ted snatching her suitcase from her and trying to talk her back into the apartment, Streep's performance really soars. Hoffman is only really asked to play two notes here: confusion and a get-her-back-inside agenda. Streep, further ahead in Kramer Vs. Kramer's narrative as its driving force, has a whole barrelful. She has to incorporate confusion, fear, stay-on-track exit planning (she abandons her suitcase immediately when keeping it would be a struggle), anger, nearly suicidal grief, and years of pent-up anger into her face, line delivery and body language. Miraculously, it's all there just below the splintering ice.

As the elevator doors close on her old life, Joanna Kramer looks completely exhausted but Meryl Streep, thoroughbred actress, still has enough stamina for the scene's death blow.

[about her son] He's better off without me.
[to her husband] I don't love you anymore.
She punctuates this devastating opening scene with so much self-loathing, weary resignation and lost soul grief that it's nearly impossible to stop thinking about her. Her absence is a vacuum and the audience rushes in to fill it. Which, is exactly where the narrative needs you to be.

For, despite its title, Kramer vs. Kramer is not the story of a warring husband and wife but instead the story about a father and son coping with the sudden absence of this wife and mother. When Joanna returns to the movie, much later she is no longer the same woman. Neither are Ted and Billy the same father and son. Robert Benton's sensitive script and direction (both Oscar winners) detail the nuances and adult realizations of these changed dynamics. The court scenes as the Kramers fight for custody are appropriately sad and intrusive not least because both of the Kramers have already come to realize the rather gargantuan mistakes they have made in their marriage and child reading. And though Joanna's notion that personal happiness left her with no choice but to abandon her child may enrage some viewers, Streep has humanized the character enough to make any singular reaction to this complicated woman reductive.

Kramer vs. Kramer is definitely more of a time capsule than a timeless treasure but I submit that it's undervalued. Its reputation was surely damaged by its Oscar win over far superior envelope-pushing movies (All That Jazz and Apocalypse Now). To some it reads as an outdated sexist drama. That's certainly a valid read: the liberated woman in this case is quite possibly an unfit mother and is most definitely the icy antagonist while the abandoned husband is generally presented as a good father and likeable guy. But for all of Kramer's male gaze (and it's definitely a man's picture) the film strikes me as an essentially honest exploration of the confusion that men must have felt at the time (and some probably still do) when they are forced into the discovery of the unknown Other lying beside them. Her dreams, as it turns out, are her own.


Though dated, Kramer vs. Kramer is still absorbing thanks to the natural chemistry between Dustin Hoffman and screen son Justin Henry, the confident simplicity of the story and especially Streep's terrific star-making work. For anyone still assuming that their happiness is also their spouse's happiness, Joanna Kramer remains a discomfiting, restless spectre of the invisible, the unknowable and the unfulfilled. She still haunts.
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Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Hump Day Hotness: Marital Bliss

Have you seen Vanity Fair's list of Hollywood's rarest unions: the longterm actor/actress marriage? I don't need to tell you that most Tinseltown marriages end in divorce. Yet some couple stick by each other and anyone in a long term relationship or marriage will know what a feat that often is. The immortal Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward are the longest lasting dual movie star marriage -- they were married for 50 years before Newman's death (2008, RIP). But the lengthiest dual actor marriages ever? The Reagans with 52 years and, up at the tippity top, recent Oscar nominee Ruby Dee (American Gangster) and Ossie Davis (2005, RIP) with 56 years of happily ever after.


I'm sure you've heard the famous Newman paraphrase about fidelity
Why fool around with hamburger when you have steak at home?
but what I loved most about their celebrated marriage was that they weren't overly sentimental about it in interviews, often admitting that couples can drive each other nuts, and regularly implying that patience and space are required -- they probably weren't co-dependent nuts in other words. They were able to do things without the other. The sense of humor also definitely helped. I hadn't read this before but I love the inscription on Newman's wedding gift (sherry glasses and a silver cup) to Woodward in 1958
So you wound up with Apollo / If he's sometimes hard to swallow / Use this.
The longest SAG marriages still running: Paula Prentiss (The Stepford Wives) and Richard Benjamin (Portnoy's Complaint) who've been together since 1961 and Oscar winner Olympia Dukakis and Louis Zorich (Mad About You) who've been together since 1962.

The only thing unsatisfying about a very satisfying stability-list like this is that a lot of star couples skip the matrimony part* so it's not entirely accurate. Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins have been together for 21 years now and have yet to marry. And then there's the 26 year situation between Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell.


Clockwise, top left: Patricia Wetting & Ken Olin, Tim Robbins &
Susan Sarandon (not married),
Helena Bonham-Carter & Tim Burton (not
married), Dukakis & Zurich,The Beatty /
The Bening, Will and Jada, Amy
Madigan & Ed Harris and Jamie Lee Curtis &
Christopher Guest.

Two weeks back I attended a wedding in Austin which was multi-racial / multi-cultural (Japanese and American) and multi-religious (Shinto, Unitarian, Mormon) and included a moment to honor those who can't be legally married yet (the bride, a longtime friend of mine, has two mommies and two daddies). It was awesome. So anyone who thinks Rachel Getting Married was pure east coast liberal fiction can suck it! My point, which I haven't even gotten to, is this: Ain't love grand? ... and complicated ... and hard to measure... and worth celebrating whether it's fresh or well aged and whether or not there's a wedding certificate?! Celebrate it!

Truth, Beauty, Freedom...
and above all things, Love
P.S. Ryan Reynolds and Scarlett Johansson (aka "Abs & Boobs") have now been married for 7½ months !

<--- P.S. 2 Check out this awesome photograph of Newman and Woodward at home, just a few years into their marriage. SO adorable. Thanks to Catherine for pointing the way to it.

previously on hump day hotties:
April Fools, Battlestar Galactica, Carla Gugino, Juliette Binoche, Gael Garcia Bernal & Diego Luna and many more...

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

A Wedding

I can't imagine directing one.

Francis Coppola on the set of The Godfather

I hadn't been to a wedding in so long and suddenly I can't escape. I blame my niece, the first infant in my life (I was the baby of the family), who up and got married last year making me feel ancient. She seems to have set off a trend. Strangely, three of my five closest girlfriends are getting married back to back to back in the hot months this year: Texas, New York, New Jersey. Will your summer be as matrimonial and festive?

What's your favorite movie wedding?

P.S. Here's a newish Vanity Fair article on the making of The Godfather films, from which I snagged the photo above.

Friday, September 26, 2008

20:08 (The 40 Year-Old Bride)

Screenshots from the 20th minute and 8th second of films of 2008

and Caroline Herrerra... and Christian LaCroix... and DIOR [pictured] ... and Oscar de la Renta... and, finally, Vivienne Westwood.
Carrie Bradshaw, enduring pop culture clotheshorse and television's favorite neurotic single gal, enunciates each name carefully, as if not to wrinkle the dresses by blurting them out too forcefully or ripping a seam whilst stumbling over a jutting syllable.

<--- She's about to bust out that doubled-over / elbows out pose that's so popular on reality show modeling competitions. A pose that judges will invariably call "editorial" or "high fashion" and never once "derivative" even though people have been doing it since at least the days of Kristin McNemany and Linda Evangelista (and probably well before that)

Designers are namechecked a lot in the world of Sex & the City but in this particular scene it's appropriate since it is a fashion shoot. Our Carrie Bradshaw (the ever divisive Sarah Jessica Parker) is Vogue's bridal cover girl. Quite a coup. Unbeknownst to Carrie, this cover spectacle will ... well, it will cause P-L-O-T to happen. And it's about time since we're 20 minutes into the movie.

I kid. I love the movie... though I realize it's not so much a movie as a chance to reconnect with the girls. After watching the very awkward remake of The Women (2008) I became even more convinced that Sex & the City for all it's "now" appeal, is actually a worthy homage to girlie movies of yore. It even breaks for fashion shows just like the old black and whites used to. Sex & the City gets dinged often for being materialistic and shallow. The former charge applies, the latter does not. Carrie especially has been confronted with her own materialism and other less-than-desirable traits throughout the series. The actress and scripts have never shied away from her complexities or from investigating the shallower or, to be more generous, the fluffier pockets of her personality.


Most economic porn movies -- which is to say most movies -- including The Women never look deeply at their character's finances. Shopping sprees are rarely seen as anything other than triumphant and nobody would ever be forced to confront that they were living way beyond their means (as Carrie was during the course of Sex and the City). Now, that's shallow and materialistic, to continually glorify consumer culture and never once have to foot the bill. Everybody in television and the movies has apartments and wardrobes that they could never afford in real life -- I was giggling just last night that I was supposed to find Ugly Betty's spacious new Manhattan apartment (with big windows!) a horror. If I didn't already love my apartment I would've taken over her lease in a heartbeat.
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Tuesday, July 22, 2008

恭喜恭喜 (Congratulations!)

UPDATED ~ Tony Leung Chiu-Wai, (Hero, Red Cliff, Chungking Express, In the Mood for Love and a million other fine films) married Carina Lau (2046, Days of Being Wild) his longtime girlfriend yesterday in Bhutan. Here they are!



Below is the initial "they're getting married" post from Sunday...

Nathaniel here.
Back for a moment from my break because I couldn't NOT mention this. My thanks to loyal TFE reader Tony for the heads up on this news.

Tony Leung Chiu-Wai, also known as "One of the Best Living Actors and World Great True Movie Stars" --or at least he would have those titles if the cinema were a meritocracy -- is marrying his longtime love/sometime co-star Carina Lau (2046, Days of Being Wild) tomorrow, Monday July 21st in Bhutan.


Here they are dressed in traditional Bhutanese garb (apparently provided by the royal family) in their first official wedding pic. Reports have it that Wong Kar Wai himself (Scorsese to Leung's DeNiro or von Sternberg to Leung's Dietrich if you need reference points) is going to film and edit the ceremonies for his muse.

That sound you hear is the confused crack of millions of movie fanatic hearts breaking, overlayed with their saner selves whispering congratulations to the dreamboat. (It's complicated when movie stars we ...erm... love are no longer available as it were)

In popular imagination Tony is usually paired off with Maggie Cheung who he romantically co-starred with in the masterpiece In the Mood for Love (2001, pictured left) as well as the box office smash Hero (they were the doomed lovers Broken Sword and Flying Snow) and a handful of other films. They were sometimes said to be coupled offscreen as well. Either way it was screen chemistry for the ages: Beatty/Christie level screen chemistry.

Maggie Cheung has unfortunately retired from acting (I weep) but Leung & Lau's relationship continues. They've been a couple since the late 80s when they were both in their 20s (they're 45 and 42 now). One assumed she was totally OK with that whole 'paired with Maggie' thing but for new rumors that Cheung was not invited to the wedding. Like many internationally famous couples, Leung & Lau are old pros at weathering the storm of controversies and gossip. In 2007 there were reports linking Lau to billionaire Terry Gou as well as that entire Tang Wei, Lust Caution 'were they really doing it?' controversy (um, I think yes. Carina says no)


So... 恭喜恭喜, Gong He Gong He, Gong Xi Gong Xi, Congratulations! to this gorgeous and talented longtime couple. For further reading on the wedding check out International Herald Tribune or The Star Online.

And because it's fun to gawk at movie stars, one more round of Leung & Lau goodness through the years....

Sunday, June 29, 2008

"pink silk bunting draped over anything that would stand still"

I'm cheating for this last episode of 'June Weddings'. This wedding was all about Easter but I couldn't not include it... could I?
____Shelby Eatenton and Jackson Latcherie were married Easter weekend, 1989 at the Chinquapin Parrish Presbyterian Church.
____The bride is the daughter of M'Lynn and Drummond Eatenton of Dogwood Lane. The bridegroom is the son of Robert and Harlene Latcherie of Frenchman's Point, LA.
____The bride was escorted by her father down a pink carpet. She wore a white silk princess cut gown trimmed with pink rosettes. She carried of bouquet of pink roses. The best man was Ross Herbert. Eight cousins to the bride and Margorie St. Moray served as bridesmaids.
____Following the wedding, a reception was held at the Eatentons. The house was decorated with every pink flower west of the Mississippi and a blood red velvet cake was served.
____The bride is currently employed as a pediatric nurse. The bridegroom is a lawyer. The couple plan to continue living in Louisiana and grow old together.
previous weddings: The Little Mermaid, The Muppets Take Manhattan, Showgirls, Far From Heaven, Spider-Man 2, West Side Story and The Incredibles

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Under Above the Sea

His Majesty's wedding but one day past was full of surprises. Fowl and fish attacked the wedding party. A beauty of fiery hair known only as Ariel was seen embracing the Prince in the chaos.

The bride to be shocked the royal court by transforming into a grotesque sea witch. Disrupting the nuptials, she abandoned ship dragging young Ariel with her. Brave Prince Eric dived into the stormy waters to rescue the maiden and destroy the foul beast.

Today the wedding will begin anew for our triumphant Prince. The bride Ariel ~ the very rescued mystery maiden herself! ~ will wear a white ball gown with foam green trim and a gold tiara. Prince Eric will be decorated in Royal Navy attire. They will be married under a pink canopy onboard the King's vessel.

The couple will reside in the castle and plan to live happily ever after.
Centuries old public posting archived by Nathaniel R., date unknown. Artist's rendering of the mysterious bride by Jenny Lerew.
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Monday, June 23, 2008

"Someone's Getting Married!"

In a surprise move, superstars Miss Piggy and Kermit the Frog were finally married yesterday, on stage on Broadway at the opening night of The Frog's latest creation, Manhattan Melodies. A real preacher stepped in to officiate for Gonzo, who was expected to play the role of "minister". The spectacular wedding featured a chorus of singing penguins, bears, chickens, dogs, rats, eagles, frogs, pigs and various unidentifiable species.

The bride wore a white lace dress with thirty-foot train, purple lace gloves and a bejeweled bridal veil. She carried a bouquet of pink and white roses.

After the ceremony the couple were immediately whisked away to what appeared to be a honeymoon on the moon itself. Miss Piggy and Kermit the Frog plan to continue working in show business.

Speculation as to whether the leading couple will renew their vows at each performance continues. Official spokesanimals for
Manhattan Melodies were unavailable for comment.


This news clipping, in pristine condition, originally appearing in the New York Sun (circa 1984), is on loan to The Film Experience from Miss Piggy's vast personal collection of Miss Piggy memorabilia. We are doing our utmost to return it to her with nary a scratch, tear or stain upon it.

Sunday, June 22, 2008

June Weddings

Penny Stum and James Smith were married June 21st, 1996 at Chapel 4 on the strip in Las Vegas.
The bride is the daughter of Dorothy Stum. The bridegroom is the son of Vern Hovell Smith and Joyce Esther House.
The bride wore a hot pink lace maternity dress and carried pink calla lilies.
Their daughter, who they plan to name Hope Heather Smith, is due in July. They live in Paradise, NV and are employed at Stum's Groceries.

[excerpted from the June 22nd, 1996 edition of the Las Vegas View]

Friday, June 13, 2008

June Weddings

___Catherine Haynes and Frank Whitaker were married June 13th, 1944 at the Indian Hill Country Club. Justice of the Peace Jim Lyons officiated.
___The Bride is the daughter of Adam and Tina Haynes of Middlesex County. The bridgeroom is the son of Steve and Mary Whitaker of New Haven.
___The bride was escorted by her parents. She wore a candlelight satin wedding gown. She carried a bouquet of lavender roses. Following a reception at the Club, the couple left for Niagara Falls.
___The bride is currently employed as a stenographer. The groom is a recent graduate of Boston University and employed as a junior sales rep at Magnatech Corp. The couple will be living in Hartford, CT where they plan to raise a family.
Excerpted from the June 14th, 1944 edition of the Hartford Courant, "America's oldest continuously published newspaper"

pssst. thirteen or so years later
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Thursday, June 12, 2008

June Weddings

Excerpt from the June 12th, 2004 edition of New York City tabloid, The Daily Globe...
...their engagement had been announced at the Science Library of New York's annual benefit gala where Captain John Jameson was the guest of honor. But it all ended shockingly as the bridegroom was left standing at the altar, dumbfounded. He held a literal "Dear John" note in his hand. Father of the bridegroom J. Jonah Jameson, publisher of the The Daily Bugle and notorious tightwad, immediately cancelled the catered reception noting the high cost of caviar.

Runaway Bride
Mary Jane Watson, 20 of Forest Hills, was last scene running from the church past the public fountain. She still wore her full wedding ensemble, a white bridal gown with long trail and white diamond drop earrings. The runaway bride still carried her full bouquet of white flowers. Eye-witnesses claim to have seen a huge smile on her face.

Psychiatric experts warn that though last minute wedding jitters are far more common in movies, such erratic behavior in life is usually indicative of mood disorders. Former high school classmates say that Ms. Watson, a popular student and would be actress, had been known to suffer periodic bouts of moony depression and had recently grown estranged from friends. Millionaire Harry Osborne, a frequent companion, was notably not present for the intended nuptials.

"She always had that sleepy far away look in her eyes. Like she wasn't even there," said former boyfriend Flash Thompson, prompting yet more speculation about the bride's psychological well-being...
previous weddings: Tony & Maria and Mr and Mrs Incredible

Monday, June 2, 2008

June Weddings

Maria Nunez became the bride of Tony Wyzek on June 2nd, 1957. The bride and groom have asked that their parents names be withheld. The closed ceremony, in which bride and groom sang identical vows, took place at Lucia's Bridal Shop on the west side. Maid of Honor was Anita Palacio. Best Man was Riff Lorton. The bride wore a pale yellow work dress with a traditional bridal veil. The bride is a seamstress at Lucia's. The groom is a stock boy at Doc's Candy Shop. The couple, each currently residing with their parents, plan to leave the west side immediately.

[excerpted from the New York Times June 3rd edition. Corrections were later printed (Anita and Riff had not actually attended the ceremony). The groom and his best man were also featured the following day, albeit in a different section of the news paper.]
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Sunday, June 1, 2008

June Weddings

Helen and Bob Parr were married June 1st, 1989, at the church on St. Pablo Ave. Justice of the Peace Brad Bird presided. The bride is the daughter of Mr and Mrs. Conyers Georgia. The groom is the son of Mr and Mrs Craig T Parr. The bride wore an ivory silk Valenta ball gown. She carried a bouquet of white daisies. Best man was Lucius Best.

The bride is a graduate of Metroville University with a degree in hydrocarbon polymerology. She currently serves the public as a superhero. The groom also performs heroics. They plan to continue incredible crime fighting and reside in downtown Metroville.


[excerpted from the Municiperg Tribune, June 2nd, 1989]