Five x Five

5 Funny Reads
Then fuck you, Jack Outlaw Vern on Animal Kingdom 'Australia's answer to Goodfellas'. Hilarious as always, that Vern.
Tom & Lorenzo "Kristin Chenoweth had a gayer Saturday night than we did."
The Onion "Oscar Contenders" It's all about the killer punchline.
SteveMartinToGo every so often I forget how much I love Steve Martin and then I remember while laughing. Usually I have this weird split second where I don't laugh. And then I start laughing.
Pajiba Why comic actors keep making such terrible movies. Oh, wait. This isn't funny. It's just about the funny. It's kind of sad actually.

The day WINGS won the first Oscar -hey, we discussed that one!

5 News Bits of Note
Oscars.org I'm going to love this Oscar countdown stopping in on each ceremony. Wheeee
Backstage Blogstage They're going to let the Glee cast graduate in 2012. Smart move for longevity (if the phenom show can manage longevity that is.)
Bad Ass Digest Cate Blanchett will remain Galadriel (The Hobbit casting)
Artforum it's not really "news" unless you wait for it each year and I do: John Water's Top Ten List: Jackass 3D, Dogtooth and more...
Movie|Line must-read interview with Jesse Eisenberg. He's a great candid interview but saying...

It’s hard to kind of attribute any kind of personal success to [it]. I just feel that I’ve been better in other things, so the fact that there’s so much attention on this movie in some ways is a bit jarring to me. Because I wonder what will happen if I’m not involved in something as great as this... the reception is not in accordance with what I felt I produced.

 ...probably isn't the best way to secure oneself an oscar nomination.

Just sayin'.

"You won't link me when I'm angry"

Hell on Frisco Bay Silent Summer at the Castro. Love the poster for the Louise Brooks picture (such a great movie). This can be filed under the Grass is Always Greener. NYC has a ton of cool film programs and I'm always wishing I could go to the Castro's film programs.

The Film Doctor good piece on a second look at the 'suicidal cool' of Tom Ford's A Single Man.
Serious Film File this one under Lines I Wish I'd Written. On Peter Jackson returning to The Hobbit

"If only there was some convenient metaphor for some thing people just can't bring themselves to let go of."

Movie|Line Angelina Jolie's "lightning round" of possible future projects. Why does the MTV reporter pronounce Maleficent so bizarrely. Did he never see the glorious Sleeping Beauty as a child? P.S. I love Jolie and I love Maleficent but for all that is holy I cannot stand the thought of that fusion under Tim Burton's direction. I literally would have to be dragged to see it which, well, if you understood how much I loved Maleficent you would understand the utter devastation I'm feeling.

Coming Soon meetings have begun for Wicked with several directors interested (JJ Abrams, Rob Marshall, James Mangold, Ryan Murphy). If you're wondering why I haven't written about it, it's that we have no substantial news and I'm just feeling disaster coming. By the time they make this -- if they ever make it -- the market will have already been flooded with about 6 or 7 other Oz projects that are further along in development. I just don't understand why they waited so long. Hopefully The Wizard of Oz (1939) itself gets some sort of cool rerelease for its 75th anniversary in 2014.
/Film if people who cared about superheroes actually read The Film Experience (I know from comments that that's not really your thing) they would realize I'm a genius because I totally predict these things. MORE trouble with The Avengers. Edward Norton is not returning as The Hulk. I knew this superhero team using all big stars was r-i-d-i-c-u-l-0-u-s from the get go and I already called the delays and cancellations and cast issues. I still have trouble believing we'll ever see the film which is why those constant commercials for it interrupting the narrative of Iron Man 2 irritated me so much. (Just concentrate on the movie we're watching!!! This is not too much to ask of a movie. In fact this is just a basic storytelling requirement.) Most sites on the web feed on every crumb from studio pr about superhero movies like it's a manna from heaven, devouring it all as gospel facts until the fact changes which prompts another flurry of articles. Do movie websites do this because of page views or are they all true believers? If they are maybe I should stop writing the equivalent of "Santa Claus doesn't exist".

But what's this...?

HitFix Marvel Studios publicly dissing Edward Norton? Bad bad form. If that's the way they're going to play the movie game, why would any name actor want to work with them again? I mean, aside from the money. But Marvel Studios isn't the only studio that can offer big money.

The Hot Blog David Poland agrees that it's unprofessional.

Cinema Blend it might be Joaquin Phoenix replacing Norton. This news strikes me as hilarious since... well... when did Joaquin Phoenix suddenly get a "so easy to work with!" reputation that he'd be deemed an upgrade from Norton?

Sir Ian in San Sebastian

Congratulations to one of our favorite humans in the known universe, Sir Ian McKellen on his lifetime achievement award at the San Sebastian Film Festival.

Sir Ian, ham [photo src]

poll by twiigs.com

I feel like I've been seeing Rebecca Romijn every time I turn on the telly this month and each time I see her I think of her wondrously catty chemistry with him when they were Mystique & Magneto. They're almost the only thing I enjoyed about that awful third X-picture.

As you may have heard earlier today, Sir Ian plans to reprise his Gandalf role if*/when Guillermo Del Toro starts filming that two part feature adaptation of The Hobbit

*I'm less hopeful than others that all will go well on the legal side of these movies. Apparently the latest lawsuit was settled but doesn't it seem like legal complications *keep* arising? Plus I'm just nervous. Two movies? Why?? The Hobbit is not that overstuffed.

"LINKTUMSEPRA!"

Vanity Fair that lengthy piece on Heath Ledger is now online in case you haven't read it

The Big Picture offers a pointed critique of the same

Cinema Blend I Love You Philip Morris trailer. Does this explain the distribution problems?
PopWatch Another photo of Jake Gyllenhaal from Prince of Persia: Sands of Time. For the sake of Gyllenhaalics everywhe

re, I hope this movie opens big. His taste seems to run towards smaller dramas and a franchise on the side would help bolster those opportunities

Coming Soon a couple of set and prop pics from Clash of the Titans and The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader

Nick's Flick Picks has been doing a series on 00s films that need a second look. Nick & Tim discuss Spike Lee's controversial Bamboozled
/Film a third lawsuit for The Lord of the Rings. Will The Hobbit actually happen? Speaking of... worst idea ever: Harry Potter as Bilbo Baggins. I'm convinced that that particular casting rumor is only breathless fangasm and entirely removed from reality. Peter Jackson isn't dumb.
Antagony & Ecstasy offers up a great review/defense of (500) Days of Summer

One thing I've never mentioned here: I absolutely love the snide snail's

pace of Alan Rickman's line readings. He's a joy.

Potter Everywhere

i09 "Harry Potter and the Half-Hearted Ending"

Towleroad a few words from me... though you've heard my take on the vodcast
YouTube Harry/Voldemort rap battle. Kinda funny in concept. Less so in execution. I mean, a full 90 seconds before the rapping actually start? Er...

MTV Draco Malfoy (Tom Felton) has his eyes on being a musician?
The franchise's new hunk Cormac McLaggen? He's played by Freddie Stroma who already has breathless fangirls and gayboys going weak at the knee which is all well and good since Hermione wasn't the slightest bit interested. For those who love beefcake, these underwear ads featuring the actor have been making the rounds (NSFW). Hey, a man's gotta make a living before that role in a billion dollar franchise lands in his lap.

Lazy Eye Theater shares a personal response to the growing Harry Potter franchise but his defense of the movie reads to me like an ode to the strengths of television series, not cinema. Since the majority of moviegoers seem to only care about franchises, does this mean they'd rather be watching TV but just like the bigger screens?
Bad Manors Squirrel Diner Harry Potter hovers, Have you ever seen this live stream? It's so silly. Each day new objects for squirrels to interact with as they eat. (Today it's hula girls).