Emmy Live-Blog 2010

Refresh your screen often for updates.

6:30 So Kevin McHale of Glee was very nearly the first person "E!" has talked to that I remotely cared about. He's wearing a yellow bowtie -- I almost typed yellow boytoy -- Weird. I blame Madonna.

Glee Boys.

Kevin named Sally Field as his celebrity crush (!) and Brothers & Sisters as his favorite show. I hope he was conveniently forgetting this past season because it blew.

Moments before Ryan Seacrest was actually wishing Emmys on the Jersey Shore cast. I am so embarrassed for everyone. E! should have rechristened themselves S! for Shameless or Stoopid long long ago. But at least they changed their red carpet people and got rid of the silver haired pancaked makeup person.

6:40 Claire Danes looking gorgeous with relaxed hair and shimmery gown. A Truth: I sometimes wonder what Angela Chase would think of Claire Danes. It's not that I get fantasy and reality confused so much as I just tend to prefer fantasy. Danes claims the only critic she worried about for this movie was Temple Grandin herself. Danes always strikes me as so fragile with all the tics and flinching that I imagine that bad reviews ACTUALLY hurt her, like cause blistering or some such.

6:45 Eva Longoria. That rumor she was going to play the Wasp in The Avengers was one of the darkest moments of my summer.

6:50 Jon Hamm (Mad Men) named Tatum O'Neal as his first celebrity crush because of Bad News Bears. That's so cute. She was one of mine, too. Only it was because of Little Darlings which scandalized me as a kid. Scandalized! But there's definitely a connection between being scandalized by someone and crushing on them, don't you think?

7:00 Ryan Murphy is wearing a blue tux and blue sunglasses. And he actually seems a little blue (mood not porny). Maybe he's less excitable in real life than he as a TV god. Because Nip/Tuck and Glee are nothing if not excitable.

7:01 January Jones is going to play Emma Frost "The White Queen" in X-Men: First Class which I think is kind of a brilliant casting decision. I understand the internet thinks otherwise but the internet is craycray


7:03 I'm not kidding you that this is what the E! cameramen did intermittently throughout Christina Hendrick's interview. Again: S!

or maybe E! is correct: E! for Exploitative. P.S. I love those Mad Men barbie dolls. I don't have Joan though. Just the Drapers.

7:12 Bill & Sookie (Anna Paquin) are now married. It's true. And yet they still have to answer constants nudity and sex questions on the red carpet. They're talking about their Rolling Stone photoshoot and how they covered each other's bit. One of the weird annual joys of awards season is watching Bill (I forgot his name. Deal) get embarrassed while talking about the sex scenes and use hand motions to describe body parts. Last year he used his hands, cupped, to demonstrate his butt pumping technique on the show. I kid you not.

Classy! But True Blood is A grade B trash and that's why we love it.

7:34 I'm so bored right now. I was all excited for about 41 minutes. But there are too many TV stars I don't care about. Like Juliana Marguiles. I have this fear that The Middlebrow Wife is going to win lots of awards tonight. It seems so Emmys.

7:52 Julie Bowen just said that her favorite shows on television are 30 Rock which she deemed an "old school" choice (... um, it's only been on for like four years. It's not like Law & F'in Order) and Project Runway her guilty pleasure. Meanwhile the reporter appeared to be headed to Las Vegas right after the show. A cut-out at your waist?

7:59 Billy Bush is TERRIBLE at his job. He really is. He's like "The Emmys" like that's as interesting as a message from their sponsors.

8:03 Opening skit. Glee themed. Gee, I wonder who will win tonight. Was that really Jon Hamm's voice just now? It's fun to see Dr Drew reunited with Liz Lemon but otherwise that number was atrocious. There were lots of pauses for laughter with no laugh track and (presumably) no one laughing. NEXT DAY NOTE: I'm reading around that net that people mostly loved this opening. Hmmm. The dangers of live blogging and divided attention?

8:10 Supporting Actor Chris Colfer, Glee | Neil Patrick Harris, How I Met Your Mother | Jesse Tyler Ferguson, Modern Family | Eric Stonestreet, Modern Family | Ty Burrell, Modern Family | Jon Cryer, Two and a Half Men And the winner is Eric Stonestreet. Yay!

Reaction shots!

So the straight man playing the gay man in the gayest category ever won. But he is truly hilarious on that show. "I ate the sun!"

8:20 txtcritic explaining The Bing Bang Theory to my clueless BFF "it's about three nerds that live together." That sounds unmissable! Modern Family takes another award for Best Writing in Comedy. Well deserved.

8:26 Supporting Actress Julia Bowen, Modern Family | Sofía Vergara, Modern Family | Jane Lynch, Glee | Kristen Wiig, Saturday Night Live | Jane Krakowski, 30 Rock | Holland Taylor, Two and a Half Men And the winner is... JANE LYNCH as expected.

Thanks the cast, her agent, "my lord and creator Ryan Murphy"
(ha!) her wife. and then a "God Bless"

She's so talented but I feel a bit bad for Krakowski who had her best season ever I think. Is she having a "rage stroke" right now?

8:35 Ryan Murphy wins Best Comedy Director Glee. He says the show is about the value of arts education. My friend (who watches Glee every week) "That sounds so interesting. I'd love to watch that show. What show is he talking about?" Ha! Something tells me that Glee has peaked. Even fans are mocking it tonight.




I should note that somewhere in there was a skit with the Modern Family cast that actually had a good 3D joke featuring Sofia Vergara's boobs. I feel certain that the entire camera crew of E! television guffawed.

8:40 Comedy Actor Jim Parsons, Big Bang Theory | Larry David, Curb Your Enthusiasm | Matthew Morrison, Glee | Tony Shalhoub, Monk | Steve Carell, The Office | Alec Baldwin, 30 Rock And the winner is... Jim Parsons.

8:45 Comedy Actress Lea Michele, Glee | Julia Louis-Dreyfus, The New Adventures of Old Christine | Edie Falco, Nurse Jackie | Amy Poehler, Parks and Recreations | Tina Fey, 30 Rock | Toni Collette, The United States of Tara And the winner is... Edie Falco.


In her acceptance speech she says "I'm not funny." Ha. Well, that's true. But your supporting cast sure is. And Edie is marvelous on that show, don't you think? And even better: very little like her Sopranos self. That's range.

8:51 Top Chef wins Best Reality Series. I had no idea that Padme was this divisive but my friends all started arguing about her. There was only pure hate and big love. Nothing inbetween. Weird.

8:55 They keep showing Oprah commercials. We're laughing because we've decided that "Steadman" is the best fake boyfriend name since "George Glass."

9:00 Chris Meloni. I just had to turn the air conditioner back on.

9:02 Best Writing Drama for Mad Men. This is the lamest live blog ever. I apologize. The Emmys are somehow sucking the life out of me. Maybe it's because the awards have not been embarrassing. And the acceptance speeches have been very standard so far. And the hosting not inspired. So... uh... APOLOGIES.

9:04 Supporting Actor Nominees Aaron Paul, Breaking Bad | Martin Short, Damages | Terry O'Quinn, Lost | Michael Emerson, Lost | John Slattery, Mad Men | Andre Braugher, Men of a Certain Age And the winner is...Aaron Paul. I guess I need to watch this show. Aaron Paul looks like the tiniest person alive. A pocket Emmy winner.

9:10 Supporting Actress Nominees Sharon Gless, Burn Notice | Rose Byrne, Damages | Archie Panjabi, The Good Wife | Christine Baranski, The Good Wife | Christina Hendricks, Mad Men | Elisabeth Moss, Mad Men And the winner is...Archie Panjabi. I like her but it's not OK that Christina Hendricks lost when she doesn't even get nominated for each season. But Mad Men doesn't have much luck winning acting prizes, does it.

9:15 Lead Actor Bryan Cranston, Breaking Bad | Michael C Hall, Dexter | Kyle Chandler, Friday Night Lights | Hugh Laurie, House | Matthew Fox, Lost | Jon Hamm, Mad Men And the winner is Bryan Cranston for the third time. Poor everyone else. This is actually why I've never been into the Emmys. It's like making your bed in the morning. There's always deja vu.

Beautiful gracious speech from Cranston, though. If there's a takeaway from the evening it's that we're all supposed to be watching Breaking Bad. I feel left out.

9:24 Jimmy Fallon just isn't funny. I think that's the problem. He's doing a musical In Memoriam to shows that went off the air. The lyrics were mildly amusing for the 24 spot. But otherwise I'm lost. And he's doing Lost "I didn't understand it, but I tried."

9:25 My best friend on Glee "If Glee loses, it will follow the storyline of the show. And thus, will only serve the show." Hee.

9:30 I forgot to mention that Dexter won Direction of a Drama. I feel like I am seran wrapped to a table right now and the Academy of Television is a serial killer ready to do me in. I'm so over this.

9:34 Lead Actress January Jones, Mad Men; Connie Britton, Friday Night Lights; Kyra Sedgwick, The Closer; Glenn Close, Damages; Juliana Marguiles, The Good Wife; Mariska Hargitay; Law & Order: Special Victims Unit And the winner is... Kyra Sedgwick

This will not help to free me up from the seran wrap.

I'll say come on, come on, come on, come on, yeah take it!
Take another little piece of my heart now, baby. (break a..)

9:36 I swear Jimmy Fallon is hosting this show from his basement. It's so 12 year old boy "funny" rather than funny.

9:40 The Tonys just won something. My friend thinks that awards shows should be ineligible to win prizes at other awards shows. Listen, I love Broadway but seeing a Broadway show will not change your life. And as my friend Ed says "It'll change your bank account."

9:53 Ricky Gervais is SO funny. "Bucky Gunts" for the win.

9:55 I may actually expire before this show is over.

10:08 Julia Ormond just won Supporting Actress for a TV Movie Temple Grandin. They spelled her name wrong "Julia Ormand" and then she couldn't remember Catherine O'Hara's last name? A joke? I'm very confused right now. Earlier today I forgot the word to "balcony" I am terrified that I have Aphasia. Or at least I am terrified that awards shows have it.

10:16 Temple Grandin won another. Is that about a disease? I shouldn't joke about Aphasia. But I really did forget the word for balcony earlier. WTF?

10:17 Jewel is doing In Memoriam? But without an intro. I remember HER but I can't remember "balcony"

10:20 These In Memoriams are always so sad. Sniffle.

10:23 We're now eating Iceland skyr... it's a little mealy or chalky or something. Do not like. Sorry Iceland.

10:24 I have lost the thread.

10:26 Some time ago George Clooney won a humanitarian prize. He really is a great person. But my apartment -- I have a couple friends over -- we're now experimenting with cuisine and discussing the Scissor Sisters. I tried!


Look how A-MAZ-ING this photo is that my BFF took? The light is emanating from Jake Shears chest. It's not the first time. Light is also absorbed there. The light in my eyeballs.

10:30 Oh all right. If I must. Back to the Emmys.

Lead Actress Nominees Joan Allen, Georgia O'Keefe | Judi Dench, Return to Cranford | Maggie Smith, Capturing Mary | Claire Danes, Temple Grandin | Hope Davis, That Special Relationship And the winner is... Claire Danes.


Her acceptance speech was fun. I would quote it for you now but I lost the thread. I'll have to backtrack. But she was cute and, it's like, something Angela Chase would've said if she'd become, like, a tv star. For reals.

10:38 Lead Actor Nominees Jeff Bridges, A Dog Year | Ian McKellen, The Prisoner | Al Pacino, You Don't Know Jack | Dennis Quaid, That Special Relationship | Michael Sheen, That Special Relationship And the winner is... Al Pacino. I hate his hair so much.

BTW Latisse is probably loving how many opportunities Claire Danes has had to blink and coo at the camera tonight. Those lashes sure are lovely!

10:40 Yes, please wrap it up Pacino.

10:41 OMG. He is STILL talking? They would drown anyone else out with orchestra music.

Except maybe Betty White.

10:42 I am beyond TIME. I am now going to share a screencap that happened before Al Pacino won. Because I cannot be contained by time or by my own time stamping. F*** you 10:42 I am 10:36 or something. Take it. You'll take it and you'll like it.


MmmmmSkarsgård.

10:46 I feel like if you add up all the times Tom Hanks has been on awards stages accepting prizes -- best miniseries -- you would equal my life. Or at least up until say high school graduation. He's logged years up there is what I'm saying.

10:50 So Claire Danes was just called "bottomlessly talented" does this mean her bottom is without talent? She'll always have her eyelashes.

LAST TWO AWARDS. YEEHAW.

Defending New York City champs 30Rock and Mad Men, both of which have won for every season aired (thus far), defend their titles. Will they repeat for their 4th and 3rd respective seasons? We'll find out in seconds.

Drama Breaking Bad | Dexter | The Good Wife | Lost | Mad Men | True Blood And the winner is... MAD MEN. Yes! Best show on TV. You know my feelings about it. January Jones is wearing a dress made of a blue chinese new year dragon. Shell breasts. How cute was that little exchanged look between the Drapers on stage?

Comedy Curb Your Enthusiasm | Glee | Modern Family | Nurse Jackie | The Office | 30 Rock
And the winner is...[nailbiter] Modern Family! Great great show. Yay. Deserved. So consistent and so beautifully executed and just, well, funny. And the award is called "Best Comedy"

10:59 Okay wow. So the awards went to fairly deserving things but Jimmy Fallon was terrible. I'm out.

The clear winner of the night is... (I think we all know).... Claire Danes. How soon does HBO offer her her own series?

11:54 OK. I really must sleep now but I just wanted to remind Sofía Vergara of her commitments.



The End.
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Red Carpet Lineup

A random sampling of people hitting the red carpet the past... uh... couple of weeks (Yes, I'm on time delay) Girls and boys for a change and some random thoughts regarding them.


Penélope Cruz. is having a rather extended bout of premieres for Broken Embraces and by the time that winds down she'll be starting it all over again to promote the musical Nine. Too much of a good thing: Nine and Broken Embraces premiere in the US within five days of each other in November. It'll be all Penélope all the time and if the baby Bardem rumors are true, she'll be 7 months preggers when those hotly anticipated titles arrive.

Diane Kruger confuses me. I normally love these androgynous outfits on women but it doesn't work for her. Maybe because the body is too emaciated / boyish to offset the masculine attire with femininity? You'd think working on Inglourious Basterds would have given her more of an appetite, a carnivorous blood red meat kind of appetite.

Gillian Armstrong is still alive! She's been very low profile for the past decade -- her last film was Death Defying Acts, that barely released Harry Houdini film with Catherine Zeta Jones and Guy Pearce -- but since 2009 is shaping up to be a breakthrough year for female directors (so many in play), it's good to be reminded of those who came before and paved the way. Armstrong gave Diane Keaton one of her best dramatic roles (Mrs. Soffel) -- Keaton would be smart to find a good drama again, I think but most importantly, Armstrong basically introduced the world to both Cate Blanchett (Oscar & Lucinda) and Judy Davis (My Brilliant Career) so the world owes her.

Speaking of people who owe Gillian Armstrong...

Claire Danes -- who got her first shot at movie stardom with Armstrong's remake of Little Women (still one of Danes' best) -- looks awesome in blue, don't you think? Her movie career isn't so enviable lately but in 35 days she'll be Mrs. Hugh Dancy so it all balances out, don't you think?

Amy Adams will survive the lack of affection people feel for the Julie part of Julie & Julia.


Stanley Tucci (Julie & Julia) should co-star with Meryl Streep in every movie from here on out. I've said this a few times now but that's only because it bears repeating. They're wonderful together. My friends and I have taken to calling him "dreadful Stanley Tucci" in replication of Streep's hilarious Globe speech for The Devil Wears Prada. Remember that?



Streep & Tucci are clearly very fond of each other and it shows onscreen. Not too many people have commented on this but isn't it kind of wonderful that two of Tucci's most memorable roles involve the love of food? See also: Big Night.

Hugh Dancy is dreamy.

Chris Messina has played the steadying-influence husband twice in a row now with Vicky Cristina Barcelona and Julie & Julia. What else you got Chris? That's meant as a compliment. We want to see.

Sam Rockwell can currently be heard in that guinea pig movie G-Force. But more importantly his one man show Moon (Katey & Nathaniel's review) is still playing in various and sundry parts of the world. I was anxiously awaiting your thoughts on it but I haven't heard a peep from readers, really. I guess it was too slow to expand, never reaching more than 251 theaters. That's a shame. Rockwell has always been prolific and he's not slowing down. Next up: the remake Everybody's Fine, the Hilary Swank working mom drama Betty Anne Waters and Gentlemen Broncos from the Napoleon Dynamite team.

Vanity Fair's Hollywood ~ Episode 11 (2005)

Missed previous episodes? See: 1995 , 1996, 1997, 1998 , 1999, 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003 and 2004.

Vanity Fair briefly killed my enthusiasm for the "Hollywood project" when they nixed the traditional cover for 2009. But time heals most wounds and I have reanimated the project's corpse. 2004's cover had 13 already peaking actresses on it. How'd they follow it in 2005? With another batch of goddesses, 60% of whom had already graced their "Hollywood" cover. In the case of the C/Kates, it was now thrice. Was Vanity Fair running out of ideas? Given the idiosyncratic pool the covers regularly pulled from you'd think there were only 40 actresses in Hollywood... but then, it's probably all in who you know who represents you when it comes to face time here. It's definitely not only about the fame. Consider this: this cover series lasted from 1995 - 2008 and Angelina Jolie, Halle Berry, Michelle Williams and Tilda Swinton never appeared on them (just four chronologically appropriate examples off the top of my head).

click to enlarge for maximum beauty

For reasons that only pop culture archives will be able to fully explain to future generations this cover was called "Not So Desperate Housewives". Only two of these actresses were even married at the time (the C/Kates) and only six kids had sprung from their enviable DNA (two kids each for Cate, Kate and Uma).

Uma Thurman, about to turn 35, had appeared on VF's very first Hollywood issue back in 1995. Back then she was celebrating her deserved Oscar nom for Pulp Fiction. I like to think that her get up here, white shirt and black pants (the only one of the ladies eschewing a gown), was a nod to "Mia Wallace" in Pulp Fiction. It would make sense. Director Quentin Tarantino had just finished (momentarily) resuscitating her talent and fame with those thrilling Kill Bills and she was about to risk memories of that film with the John Travolta dance number in Be Cool. She had divorced Ethan Hawke in 2004 and the three films coming out (Prime, Be Cool and The Producers) were a nice range of drama, comedy and musical... on paper. Onscreen it didn't work out so well. More flops followed. Uma turns 40 in 2010, and she's undoubtedly looking for that third career wind. Next up: Motherhood, Percy Jackson and Eloise in Paris.

Cate Blanchett had just been won an Oscar (The Aviator) and was about to turn 36. Aside from the Oscar win, 2005 was quiet. Blanchett never stays quiet. The next four years would be jam packed full of Oscar bait and trips down the red carpet culminating in the two biggest non-Hobbity hits of her career (Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull and The Curious Case of Benjamin Button). No films in 2009 (shocker!) but she'll be back in 2010 as Maid Marian in Ridley Scott's Robin Hood [see previous posts]

Kate Winslet was 29 years old, still Oscar-less and an old pro at the "Hollywood" covers. Uma & Cate are her superiors when it comes to behaving like models in photoshoots (think about it), but she wasn't letting them pull all the focus with her sleek über sexy look here. Her inarguable triumph in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004) was about to prove very difficult to follow. Fascinating time capsule note: 2005 is the year wherein she guest starred on "Extras" as a foul mouthed narcissistic "Kate Winslet", bitching about having to do a Holocaust drama to win an Oscar.



Despite that hilariously written and performed prophecy, her next several films didn't truly catch on (The Holiday, Little Children, Romance & Cigarettes, Revolutionary Road and All the Kings Men). The happy ending punchline arrived earlier this year when she won her Oscar for the holocaust drama The Reader. Up next: Nothing. With Oscar in hand, I'm guessing she lays low for the next couple of years. She was never a ubiquitous celebrity to begin with.

Scarlett Johansson was just 20 and already a back to back Hollywood covergirl. She had skyrocketed in 2003 with the global success of Lost in Translation, the critical success of Girl with a Pearl Earring and her high profile relationship with another Young Hollywood star, Josh Hartnett. And though nothing in 2004 had added much to her mystique she had the lead in a would be summer blockbuster for 2005 (The Island, which flopped). No one at the time saw her Woody Allen's muse status coming, but Match Point (their first collaboration) was about to debut at Cannes and become the legendary director's biggest hit in over a decade. Cut to several Scarlett roles and three calendar years later: she's beloved as a celebrity, newlywed and spokesperson but who loves her as an actress, any more? Can she turn that around with her stint as The Black Widow in Iron Man 2 (see previous post)

<-- Rupert Everett, Claire Danes and Billy Crudup at the premiere of Stage Beauty in October 2004

Claire Danes, turning 26 appears to have been slain by ScarJo. And maybe she was. Hollywood only has room for a handful of young superstar blondes in any given time period, you know. Perhaps she's prone as sacrifice for Cate, Kate and Uma none of whom have ceded much space for up and comers, holding onto big fame with that iron grip combo of talent, beauty and the favor of important filmmakers. Or maybe Mary-Louise Parker had snuck in to lay her down? It had only been a year since the gossip machine had ground and spit Claire Danes and Billy Crudup out for splitting with their partners -- in Billy's case, the several months pregnant Parker.

Which is all along way of saying that her cover girl status was slightly puzzling. Despite Danes' absolutely stellar start in television's My So Called Life and a promising initial silver screen transfer (Little Women and Romeo + Juliet), the movie career never really worked out. Her career had slipped in the late 90s and the Aughts brought nothing but a string of well performed but small supporting roles (The Hours, Igby Goes Down) or lead parts that didn't do much for her (Terminator 3, Stage Beauty). This trend continued after this cover, too: The Family Stone, Stardust, Evening and Shopgirl haven't provided breakthroughs. Up next: Temple Grandin in which she plays an autistic scientist. Should she try headlining a TV series again?

Rosario Dawson about to turn 26, had been on the cover before and had just caused a mini-fuss with her scene stealing nudity and feral performance in Alexander (2004). Vanity Fair's cover indicated a good sized year for her and it was: Sin City and Rent "I wanna go ouu--uuuuuttt, tonight" both premiered.


Zhang Ziyi newly 26, had enjoyed a high international profile since her breakthrough in Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, five years earlier. The preceding months had been very good to her with three well received successful imports: 2046 (her best performance if you ask me), Hero and House of Flying Daggers. But she was undoubtedly on this cover because everyone in the world seemed to be anxiously awaiting Memoirs of a Geisha, then only a blockbuster book and not yet a disappointing movie. She was making lists like People magazine's 50 Most Beautiful, she was a frequent object of lust in men's magazines. Once the Memoirs craze ended, things went quiet, though one can still spot her on red carpets or in paparazzi shots with venture capitalist boyfriend Vivi Nevo. Is an international comeback going to happen? She's only 30. Next up: Sophie's Revenge and possibly the romantic drama Waiting which would reunite her with her Daggers co-star, Takeshi Kaneshiro, her only co-star to ever challenge her for "prettiest person in this movie" contests.

Kerry Washington, 28, had just appeared in the Oscar nominated biopic Ray and was still dating actor David Moscow (pictured together right, Jan. 2005) Many people, including yours truly, were pulling for major stardom for Kerry. She's still high profile and highly castable (young, beautiful, talented, speaks multiple languages including very handy ones for the cinema: French and Spanish) and yet the cinema can't seem to figure it out. 2005 brought only bit parts in Mr & Mrs. Smith and Fantastic Four. When will Hollywood ever figure out big careers for the top black actresses? It seems hopelessly beyond Tinseltown's capabilities. Things are still about the same for Kerry. She'll give a great performance (The Last King of Scotland, Dead Girl) and it's like it didn't happen at all in the larger scheme of the star hierarchies. It's so frustrating. Will her new projects turn the tide? Next up: A Thousand Words with Eddie Murphy and a possibly plum possibly Oscar-bait supporting role in Mother and Child starring Annette Bening.

Kate Bosworth, 22, was fresh off the underrated romantic comedy Win a Date With Tad Hamilton! and the flop biopic Beyond the Sea starring Kevin Spacey. She was very high profile in the celebrity-watching sector as Orland Bloom's girlfriend and Hollywood seemed to have faith in her. She was soon given the Lois Lane role in Superman Returns (unfortunate casting, that). Her film career has long since been smaller than her celebrity and she hasn't actually been making many movies. Next up: The Warrior's Way.

Sienna Miller, at 23 was, like Kate Bosworth, far more famous than her filmography would imply. She was Jude Law's new fiancé -- they had just made Alfie (Oct 2004, left)-- and he was at the peak of his celebrity. A few months after this Hollywood cover they broke off the engagement and their on and off again relationship has provided tabloid fodder for years now. She followed Alfie by romancing Heath Ledger in Casanova. She's been working a lot ever since (Factory Girl, Stardust, The Edge of Love, The Mysteries of Pittsburgh) but it looks doubtful that her movie career will ever equal her celebrity. Or not. Maybe she's just the right role away from more legitimate stardom? Next up: playing "The Baroness" in G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra.

PLEASE NOTE: If you'd like to read more about any of these stars, click the names in the labels section below.

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median age: 27. Blanchett was the eldest, Scarlett the baby.
noticeably absent: Who else was topical 'round mid 2004 to mid 2005? Let's see... Monica Bellucci (international profile raised with The Matrix films and The Passion of the Christ), Jennifer Garner (transferring to movies with 13 Going on 30 and Electra), Eva Mendes (had 4 movies coming out including Hitch), Lindsay Lohan (Mean Girls) and maybe Sophie Okonedo (Hotel Rwanda)
collective Oscar stats before cover: 7 noms / 1 win (all by the front cover girls. Blanchett won for The Aviator)
collective Oscar stats after cover: 5 nominations / 1 win (3 for Cate, 2 for Kate)
fame levels in 2009, according to famousr, from most to least: Uma Thurman, Scarlett Johansson, Cate Blanchett, Kate Bosworth, Claire Danes, Sienna Miller, Rosario Dawson and Kerry Washington. Not listed in famousr for some bizarre reason: Kate Winslet & Zhang Ziyi.
previous episodes: 1995 ,1996, 1997, 1998, 1999, 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003 and 2004.
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The 9th Day of Christmas

Some 'Ladies Dancing' to kick off your weekend. Is there anything better than dancing ladies? That's a rhetorical question. There's not.

Yes, No, Maybe?

Hi, Jonathan again with more biopic news. That's Orson Welles on the left and Christian McKay on the right. McKay will be portraying Welles in Me and Orson Welles, set for a 2009 release. Does he look like him? Uh, kinda. McKay's already successfully played Welles on the Broadway stage in Rosebud so I'm not as worried about him as I am about his co-star Zac Efron. I've seen the High School Musicals (yes, god help me I've seen them) and Zac was none too impressive in them but perhaps with a good cast and a good story things will be different. After all, both Richard Linklater and Claire Danes are involved and that could make for a damn good movie. Since I'm obsessed with period pieces based on real people in Hollywood history it's a must see for me either way (this takes place in the thirties during a Mercury Theater Production of Julius Caesar). If you're interested too a word of caution: tread carefully at IMDB - their plot synopsis covers every twist and turn and takes you from the beginning of the story to the end leaving out absolutely nothing ( I already knew the story so it was okay for me but geez).

Vanity Fair's Hollywood ~Episode 3 (1997)

Playing the Hollywood Historian...

The third year of "Vanity Fair's Hollywood" led us to believe that they'd be alternating the all girl / all boy lineups forever. They'd soon disrupt the formula but it was back to a 10 girl lineup for 97. This time they were christened "The Next Wave" At the time I wasn't terribly wild about this cover. It's hard to remember why but every year when the cover premieres you have someone in particular that you feel is overlooked. I should have written it down. Now...who knows who was snubbed? 1997 isn't that clear. Looking back, though, it's the first cover that really coheres. Isn't this a beautiful color palette? Plus, nobody is pulling too much focus from anyone else either, or dressed in such a way that they don't quite fit (Hello Gwyneth Paltrow in 1995).


The collaborating cover girls were...

Cameron Diaz, who heading towards 25, still had residual heat from her successful debut in The Mask (1994) with Jim Carrey. Subsequent films hadn't achieved any impact but My Best Friend's Wedding was about to open. People were stunned that she dared a charisma-off with Julia Roberts and even more dazzled that that blinding Julia star wattage didn't burn the young upstart to a crisp on the spot. Instead it lit her up and onto the A list. Heady days of worshipful Golden Globe nominations, audience pleasing rump-shaking (Charlie's Angels) and endless Justin Timberlake carousing were just ahead. But doesn't it seem like things have gotten awfully quiet since 2002? She's only 35... where's the second act surge?

Kate Winslet was already going places at 22. She had revealed to us the brilliance of Peter Jackson (casting this particular unknown in Heavenly Creatures was his first masterstroke, don't you think?) and was the only Oscar nominee on the cover (Sense & Sensibility). You'll notice that she also had red hair. Which means, Titanic was filming. That's probably all you need to know about what happened next. Although I think it bears repeating (after the discussion of the peaks and valleys of one Ms. Kidman) that people tend to forget the valleys in tremendous careers. Nobody would ever admit to this now but there were people back in the day that felt her choice to do Hideous Kinky after Titanic was a "career killer", that she was too fat for Hollywood, etcetera. People have always been trying to tear great actresses down, particularly when they've embraced acting above the demands of being a sex symbol.

Claire Danes specialized in making me cry like a baby in the 90s. She was turning 18 here and she had already jerked my tears around in My So Called Life, Little Women, To Gillian on Her 37th Birthday and Romeo + Juliet. To virtually anyone paying attention she looked like the next big thing. Ten years later the fame persists but the career is disappointing. Mileage may vary but I think there are two problems. 1) Choice of roles. 2) She hasn't rid herself of those formerly endearing fidgety mannerisms (and nearing 30, they're distracting. Maybe it's just me but I want to see a mature actress emerge from the memories of the A list teenager.

Renée Zellweger -that's right I said the name. We're time travelling remember? This was long before she became one of my arch enemies... She Who Must Not Be Named. She was but 28 and had won many hearts and probably came thisclose to her first Oscar nomination just months before, having "completed" Tom Cruise's Jerry Maguire (1996). Previously she had also starred in The Whole Wide World (1996) and was one of several rising stars to be seen in the very funny 70s high school comedy Dazed and Confused (1993). Major stardom followed and strange things eventually began to happen... A couple of quiet years may have sufficiently doused the raging backlash that was occurring but can she regain control over those calcified mannerisms? Let's hope she's Bridget Jones squinty and not Miss Potter squinched in Leatherheads with George Clooney. (That's right, I'm calling truce. Win me back Renée... or at least don't get in the The Clooney's way. I love him best in comedies.)

Alison Elliott, 27, might be the lone member of this cover you didn't recognize. 1997 remains her biggest year. She was fresh off the Sundance surprise The Spitfire Grill (1996) but it underperformed once regular audiences got a hold of it. Later in 1997 she was in fine form as Helena Bonham-Carter's kind rival in The Wings of the Dove. Some critics called for an Oscar nomination. That didn't pan out and very strangely, Wings of the Dove was her last high profile film role.

Minnie Driver, 27 and reclining awkwardly on one elbow--Ouch Minnie-- was about to win Matt Damon's troubled heart both onscreen and off Good Will Hunting --though it'd shortly be off off. She won an Oscar nomination for her efforts as 'the girl'. At the time of this cover she was surfing good buzz from her performance in Circle of Friends. Lately she's been singing and starring on the critically acclaimed The Riches on TV.

Jada Pinkett was not yet Jada Pinkett Smith at 25 but almost. Will Smith and she made it official at the tail end of this very year. Her acting career had taken off round about 1993 with the one two punch of Menace II Society and her recurring role on television's A Different World. The previous year had been a big one for her in the movies, arguably her peak, starring in The Nutty Professor and Set it Off with Queen Latifah and this year she was in the first kill position (hi Drew Barrymore!) in Scream 2. You'll mostly see her in supporting roles these days and on the red carpet, usually in stunning metallic colors.

Jennifer Lopez was nearing 28 and Selena and Anaconda were opening, making her an instant star. She had famously been paid 1 million for Selena making her the best paid Latina actress ever at the time (if I recall correctly). She was on her way to mega stardom and becoming so famous you only needed two syllables ~ "JLo" Next up: Out of Sight (1998) which remains her best performance by so wide a margin one wishes Steven Soderbergh would cast her again.

Charlize Theron was only 21. My god, that seems like it must have been 10 years ago. oh... um... She had made a big splash in Two Days in the Valley (1996). The film wasn' t a big hit but people were really talking about her. Mostly about her hotness. It was very Jessica Alba a few years ago. Theron proved her acting chops were on par with her beauty, quickly surprising people with her intensity and believability in the otherwise ludicrous The Devil's Advocate which came out in the fall of '97. She is one of only two eventual Oscar winners (thus far) on this cover --the other being She Who Must Not Be Named. Coincidentally, they both won on the same night in 2004, seven years after this cover shoot saw the light of day --the next wave, indeed.

Fairuza Balk -had been a child actor in Return to Oz (1985) and showed a lot of maturing promise in the under seen indie Gas, Food, Lodging (1992) but was still transitioning to adult roles at 23. The year previous she had been an overcooked hoot as a witch in The Craft (still what she's most remembered for) and she would soon co-star in American History X (1998) with Ed Norton. She's been effective in some notable films or roles like Almost Famous (2000) and Personal Velocity (2002) but stardom didn't really materialize save for devoted cult pockets and she isn't in many pictures these days.

median age: 24, youngest: Claire. oldest: Renée
collective Oscar nominations before this cover: Just 1... Kate Winslet in Sense & Sensibility
collective Oscar nominations after this cover: 10 nominations with 2 wins: Charlize's Monster and Renée on Cold Mountain
fame levels in 2007, according to famousr, from most to least: Cameron Diaz, Charlize Theron, Jada Pinkett Smith, Claire Danes, Minnie Driver, Fairuza Balk and Alison Elliott. * famousr proved very unreliable this time around. No listings for Kate, Jennifer or Renée. That's some major snubbage there given the household name status.
see also: 1995 ,1996, 1997, 1998, 1999, 2000 and 2001
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Just Back From Stardust...

and I don't think it's much of a spoiler to tell you that within the magical logic of the movie Michelle Pfeiffer (absolutely rocking as an evil sorceress) needs to eat the heart of Claire Danes (a fidgety fallen star) in order to live for hundreds of years. Is it wrong to root for the heart eater? Because... Pfeiffer restored to full power??? Yes please! If Claire Danes really cared about the cinema, she'd carve it out and hand feed Pfeiffer herself. It's the least she can do.
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more later obviously...