Yes, No, Maybe So: Centurion

Lately it seems like I should maybe be retitling this blog The Fassbender Experience. And here we go again with the staring. But he gives good (movie) face. Fish Tank is still in select theaters but the next feature on the way and it's called Centurion.



All violent period epics are now required to emulate 300 or Gladiator so this one's got some Gladiator lighting and opening forest mayhem and it's got two of 300's stars, Fassbender and Dominic West.

YES. Michael Fassbender on the run. Run, Fassbender, run. While watching Fassbender running I suddenly flashbacked to Chandler and Joey's Baywatch obsession. Always with the running. Run, Michael. Run like the wind!

I should probably admit that as much as I've been obsessing over Fassbender this past year, I don't actually remember him in 300. Or which one he was. I hope he isn't the one that got beheaded. That was so gross.

NO. Which brings me to a lot of "no" here for me. I hate to get left behind in film culture but I swear to god the movies are getting too bloodthirsty and sadistic for me. It seems like it escalates every year. Pretty soon even romantic comedies will have to amp it up. Maybe their slapstick falls could end with broken bones piercing through flesh? The other no here for me is the bad catchphrases masquerading as dialogue "We live united or die divided!!!" This movie is from Neil Marshall, the director of The Descent (which I liked quite a bit) and Doomsday. I tried to watch the latter once after reading an amusing piece on it at fourfour but I couldn't make it through. Too bloody for me. I could never have been a doctor.

MAYBE SO. Here's my thing with warrior women. Love them... BUT... I also kinda hate them when they're too male fantasy. If you look at James Cameron's warrior women, they're not without sex appeal but they have considerable edge. You can't imagine them as male-malleable fantasy centerfolds is what I'm saying. So I'm not sure about these Maxim girls with swords. That said Olga Kurylenko was pretty good in Quantum of Solace so... maybe.

I think I'm a no. But then there's Fassbender. So...
Which way do you lean?
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It's Tinkerbell's World...

and soon I'll be living in it.
_______ 5 Days until Nathaniel is in DisneyWorld

TTT: Movie Posters of 2007

tuesday top ten: For the list lover in you and the list maker in me

I know I'm supposed to be thinking about 2008 by now, but I've been extremely busy with corporate work and freelance work. The annual film experience awards jamboree is suffering from the slow crawl. My apologies but I'm only one man. So let's throw out one more category ... or two.

Top Ten Movie Posters of 2007

If I had seen Hannah Takes the Stairs (left) it would have made the list (for my own awards I don't allow myself to nominate films I haven't seen. Even for categories that don't require the seeing. Like "best poster" and "tag line") I really love the color, the composition, whatnot. DIY movies, mumblecore, what have you...these movies aren't supposed to have advertising budgets and terrific posters. How'd they afford it? Was there a crew member involved with a cobweb gathering BA in design?

10 Tease it up! I wrote about the Michelle Pfeiffer Hairspray poster previously. The trend of individual "introducing..." posters is now old hat but I thought this joyous musical was an appropriate one to work that widespread marketing angle. And in Hairspray's case the "who's who behind the do?" poster made punny use of the very idea of a 'teaser' poster

09 Question: Why are international posters so regularly superior to their American counterparts? Have they done research to determine that Americans really like to stare at photoshopped movie star faces that have been awkwardly forced into a frankenstein group candid? It sure seems like they have. Anyway, I like the puzzle / symbol Zodiac poster much more than the vague dark bridge version that we got in the States. It shouldn't be creepier (bright white and all) but it is.


08 The one thing 300 had going for it was the visuals, inspired by and faithful to comic giant Frank Miller. Dig that odd thrusting composition, forcing your eye diagonally up left to a jutting cliff (will a Disney heroine be singing up top?) Then, just as violently, it lets your eye fall with the doomed warriors and a spray of blood. Now I technically know that this is a battle sequence and these are the losers of said battle. But I like to think that it's just an honest depiction of 300's masochism (machismo? just scramble the letters a bit). Watch beefy anthropomorphic lemmings march off a cliff together. Apparently that dinner in hell is tasty.


07 There were some busy posters that tried to convey the collage / multiple identity thesis of Todd Haynes Dylan biopic but the best ones were the near silhouette portraits of the film's stars. The "...is Bob Dylan" and "...are Bob Dylan" tag lines were pleasant complications to ponder while settling into the simple images.

06 It's easy to hold grudges against Bug's marketing campaign for foisted the big lie that a generic horror movie was opening. This secured the movie an OK opening weekend but a lot of walkouts, too... and disgruntled audiences means no word of mouth for future weekends. But away from the commercial (the true fraudulent culprit) the first poster is still a pretty accurate snapshot of Bug's psychological disturbances. And it's memorable too. This is a movie that gets under your skin.

and for the top 5 (i.e. the nominees) "Posters of the Year", you'll have to click over to the FB Awards.
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We Can't Wait #14 "300"

Butler readies his army for battle. Haven't you heard? Swank is his next co-star.

Readers I didn't even need to ask my very smart 'we can't wait' pals why they so desperately await this movie. The answer was perfectly obvious...


History! I mean, who doesn't want to see it? Duh.
And what better way is there to learn about ancient Sparta and the Persians?


They should teach this stuff in schools.


You can see the trailer here. Zach Snyder is the man behind the wheel here and you may recall that he directed that superb remake of Dawn of the Dead a couple of years ago. Remember how dense and literate that was? This time he's adapting a wordy Frank Miller novel, so hit the books before seeing 300 on March 9th. The more you know going in the less likely you'll be confused by all those long talky political sequences.



UPDATE: New vlog footage with Gerard Butler for more 300 action. [src]

previously on "we can't wait"
#15 Hot Fuzz
#16 Stardust
#17 The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford
#18 Spider-Man 3
#19 Rendition
#20 The Bourne Ultimatum
Intro -films that didn't make the list

We Can't Wait #14 "300"

Butler readies his army for battle. Haven't you heard? Swank is his next co-star.

Readers I didn't even need to ask my very smart 'we can't wait' pals why they so desperately await this movie. The answer was perfectly obvious...


History! I mean, who doesn't want to see it? Duh.
And what better way is there to learn about ancient Sparta and the Persians?


They should teach this stuff in schools.


You can see the trailer here. Zach Snyder is the man behind the wheel here and you may recall that he directed that superb remake of Dawn of the Dead a couple of years ago. Remember how dense and literate that was? This time he's adapting a wordy Frank Miller novel, so hit the books before seeing 300 on March 9th. The more you know going in the less likely you'll be confused by all those long talky political sequences.



UPDATE: New vlog footage with Gerard Butler for more 300 action. [src]

previously on "we can't wait"
#15 Hot Fuzz
#16 Stardust
#17 The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford
#18 Spider-Man 3
#19 Rendition
#20 The Bourne Ultimatum
Intro -films that didn't make the list

Miller @ the Movies

Sin City was the talk of April at the movie theater so where will Frank Miller's inky aesthetics strike next cinematically speaking ? The obvious choice would be in Sin City Volume 2. Robert Rodriguez (that films renegade force) works fast. And he could always finish the job of adapting Frank Miller's stories of the town without pity; Miller and Rodriguez didn't deplete all of the graphic novels in this first hit movie.

Despite the hype, the now well-known and of-the-moment Sin City was not actually the first Miller inspired movie. 2003's incredibly botched Daredevilfilm holds that disappointing and undeserved honor. The film used Miller's very famous Elektra/Bullseye arc that put both the comic (a B level character and seller) and Frank Miller the writer/artist on the map back in the day. Let's not speak of Elektra... I haven't seen it. Don't intend to. I doubt I could take it given my love of the real character. You know, the one made of ink who does not also happen to go by the moniker of 'Jennifer Garner'.

Whether or not Sin City gets a quick sequel, I expect that we'll see someone attempt Ronin before long as well. Ronin is like a mass collision of already familiar, easily marketable movie genres --Samurai / Apocalyptic Future-- most prevalent among them. The other major Miller work that we'll see adapted soon (though development hell is always a danger) is 300, a graphic novel about the Persian/Greek war and the battle of Thermopylae war.

Zach Snyder is currently set to helm. Yay! Snyder's debut was the generally impressive and tightly wound remake ofDawn of the Dead so maybe he does have what it takes to pull off the herculean task of a bloody action-packed period epic. Any guesses as to whether or not it will make it to the screen on time (2006) and with Snyder still in? Or will Hollywood execs, known for their disloyalty to those without clout if those higher on the foodchain suddenly get interested (and that could happen with Miller being suddenly a name that Hollywood types know) dump him and move on to a more boring choice. Or maybe you think he's the wrong choice to begin with? Not I.