Monday, March 20, 2006

Request: Cher

Each Monday I take a request. This week's topic comes from David G in New York. The topic is...

CHER
In the split second it took me to type the name just now, I was tempted to hit "publish post" and leave a single word as my commentary. For what is more descriptive of Cher than...Cher?

I am too young --god, I love typing that. so rare-- to have any meaningful association with the first incarnation: The one from The Sonny & Cher Show. But I do recall that she was on TV when I was a child (the exact context escapes me. Maybe it had something to do with The Donny & Marie Show ?) The first memory is one of immediate disapproval. Cher appears on the TV in all her 70s glory and there is my mother, suddenly agitated and fuming:

[translated from Mormonese]
Natty's mom: You can't watch this cheap slutty whore!
Natty: Wait --who designed that fabulous gown?

I kid. I didn't really ask about the gown, though I'm 100% certain that I was hypnotized by the sparkly bits and wanted to see much more of the this [translation] "cheap slutty whore" [/translation]. Of course I did see much more of her. Everyone did. Before Madonna ever hit the ground running, Cher had already reinvented herself thrice. First as a television comic and wife. Then a single woman and #1 solo act. And, in the 80s, a respected and Oscar-winning actress. You may have correctly named that as my favored incarnation. I never wanted to 'snap out of it.'

Unfortunately in the 90s I had to. She stopped working as much. Maybe I was projecting but I felt a tiny hint of resignation in that Mermaids star turn. Like "oh, shit. This is no Moonstruck. I've peaked" I watched with confusion as she let Winona Ryder and Christina Ricci steal the movie right out from under her shoop shoop.

Let us not speak of the infomercials, the incessant plastic surgery, and the neverending "farewell" tour. Let us merely acknowledge with some degree of awe the improbably long reign of that half breed dark lady. She's a true national treasure.

Last Week's Request: The Sound of Music
P.S.: Any requests for next week? Comment. Maybe I'll choose your pet topic.

tags: Cher, entertainment, mormon, celebrity