At the Magic Kingdom, there are parades that march through the park at certain times of the day. They start off nice and sweet, featuring the heroes of the Disney franchise:
There's Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs
There's Woody
And the Fairy Godmother
Jiminy Cricket is there
And of course Tinker Bell
Mickey Mouse, too.
And Pluto
Then bringing up the rear of the parade as if a dark cloud came over a perfectly sunny day, there are the villains:
There's Cruella De-Vil
The Queen
Jafar is along
And Captain Hook
Lady Temaine is there as well
And of course Maleficent
And every time I watch the parade, I ask myself the same question. Where's Mr. Winkie the tavernkeeper from The Madcap Adventures of Mr. Toad? All of these characters are evil to be sure, but none of them hold a candle to the wickedness that is Mr. Winkie. The guy would serve you a beer over the bar and then take out your knees from underneath it. You can see the other villains coming at you 10 miles away, with their creepy sneers and macabre costumes. They wear their viciousness on their black web-like sleeves. Mr. Winkie on the other hand is your pal. He's your friend. You invite him over for dinner and still wonder who knocked up your daughter that night and set your house on fire.
Of course it makes sense that you don't think of him when you think of Disney villains. And I'm sure that Mr. Winkie probably pays a nice public relations firm a handsome sum to keep it that way. But you ain't fooling me Mr. Winkie.
