Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Top Ten: Movie Hookers


tuesday top ten: a weekly series for the list lover in you and the list maker in me

Susan of
Awards Daily here again, with my final guest post, the "Tuesday Top Ten." Thanks to Nathaniel, my co-guest bloggers and the Film Experience readers.

This week's countdown focuses on a subject that's been in the news lately, especially for those of us in New York. That’s right, those short-skirted, high-heeled and gold-hearted dames (and dudes) who practice the "oldest profession" in the world: Hookers


Top Ten Movie Hookers


10 “Lana” in Risky Business (1983): Need quick cash while your folks are out of town (especially after trashing dad's Porsche)? Why not turn your house into a brothel? You know it's a teenage fantasy when the prostitute looks like Rebecca De Mornay. And the john is a young, dances-in-his-undies Tom Cruise.
Emperor’s Club or Street: Would probably command Emperor’s Club rates today.
Heart of Gold? More like head for business.

09 "Luenell" in Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan (2006): Actress/comedian Luenell Campbell makes the "perfect" dinner party date for the Kazakh reporter. She's also one of the few performers in on the joke.
Emperor’s Club or Street: Definitely street.
Heart of Gold? Yes.

08 "Vivian" in Pretty Woman (1990): Julia Roberts' breakthrough role had her sashaying down Hollywood Boulevard and into Richard Gere’s fancy car, hotel suite, bed, bath and ... beyond.
Emperor’s Club or Street: While she works it on the street, her weekly rate comes to $3,000. That’s far below the hourly rates of the Emperor’s Club, but one must consider inflation.
Heart of Gold? Yes. And by the end of the film, she's got the credit cards to match.

(tie) 07 “Mike” in My Own Private Idaho (1991): River Phoenix never seemed more vulnerable than when he played this young, narcoleptic street hustler.
Emperor's Club or Street: Street, but only in this film.
Heart of Gold? Yes.

(tie) 07 “Lynn” in L.A. Confidential (1997): Kim Basinger’s Veronica Lake look-alike prostitute manages to make both Russell Crowe and Guy Pearce swoon. Not bad.
Emperor’s Club or Street: Emperor’s Club, and unlike the other "starlet" hookers, she didn't need to get "cut" to achieve the Lake look.
Heart of Gold: Yes, especially when it comes to Crowe's troubled cop. (Can't say I blame her.)

06 “Linda” aka "Judy Cum" in Mighty Aphrodite (1995): Oscar winner Mira Sorvino adapts a voice that could cut through glass as the prostitute/porn star mother of Woody Allen's adopted child. The performance grates on the nerves until it wins you over.
Emperor’s Club or Street: She looks like she should be in the Emperor’s Club, but sounds Street. Bonus points for good genes.
Heart of Gold? Yes. And based on her porn credits, she also has an Enchanted Pussy.

(tie) 05 “Simone” in Mona Lisa (1986): Cathy Tyson portrays a high-priced call girl who forms a unique bond with her paid driver, the blokey George, (the wonderful Bob Hoskins). A sleek and disturbing film.
Emperor’s Club or Street: Emperor’s Club with Street ties.
Heart of Gold? She’s a little too complicated to pigeonhole.


(tie) 05 "Bai Ling" in 2046 (2004):
The breathtaking Ziyi Zhang can win the lust, but not the love of her neighbor (Tony Leung Chiu Wai) when she moves into room 2046. The film never explicitly states that she's a prostitute, but it's implied.
Emperor's Club: She's just working out of her apartment, but everything about this character is Emperor's Club.
Heart of Gold? Not in the traditional sense, but definitely more vulnerable than she'd like to be.

04 “Ophelia” in Trading Places (1983): Jamie Lee Curtis shows off that “Perfect” 80s bod and manages to keep pace with the comic talents of Dan Aykroyd and Eddie Murphy.
Emperor’s Club or Street: She’s street in the movie, but that’s only in a movie.
Heart of Gold? Definitely.

03 “Severine” in Belle de Jour (1967): Ah, marriage, soooooo mundane. That's one reason to take up an afternoon hobby as a prostitute. The ridiculously beautiful Catherine Deneuve is frigid, damaged and only able to connect with herself within the fantasy of "Belle de Jour."
Emperor’s Club or Street: Her rates are probably closer to being Street, but she's definitely Emperor's Club material.
Heart of Gold? Who can tell, it's surrounded by ice.

02 “Satine” in Moulin Rouge! (2001): Nicole Kidman broadly plays the “sparkling diamond,” at first, and then reveals the woman inside. Still, truth, beauty, freedom and (above all things) love are definitely held on a pedestal, and that’s where the tragic Satine remains.
Emperor’s Club or Street: Definitely Emperor’s Club--or in this case, The Duke's Club.
Heart of Gold? Yes. Unfortunately, her lungs are made of less durable material.

01 “Lulu” in Pandora’s Box (1929): As the doomed prostitute in this silent classic, stunning Louise Brooks launched herself, her iconic hairdo, and perhaps the prototype of the sexually liberated woman (who must pay the price for her freedom), into the cinema consciousness.
Emperor’s Club or Street: Emperor’s Club--she's a screen Goddess.
Heart of Gold? Uncertain, as Brooks is too enigmatic to define.


What ladies (or gentlemen) of the night would you pay for?
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