Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Tues Top Ten: Green Skinned Wonders

This list is dedicated to two crushes from childhood that never went away: First, Yvonne Craig (i.e. Batgirl!) who once played an Orion slave girl on Star Trek (prized for their eroticism). Second, Daryl Hannah... who is more caucasian than green but she doesn't think so. Leonardo DiCaprio may get all the press for being an environmentalist but Daryl is the hardcore real deal. I absolutely love her and you should, too. Plus you know: "California Mountain Snake" ... (red and yellow but you know -- snakes = green in the broader sense. Wha--Where am... Oh yes, the list).

Ten Best Green-Skinned Movie Characters

10 Speaking of snakes... One of the scariest things I ever saw as a kid was Medusa in The Clash of the Titans (1981). Don't stare too closely at her lopsided [shudder] key-lit eyes. You know what can happen... I'm so thankful that model work and stop motion haven't completely died in the movie making world because they are so much freakier than CGI as visual effects go. Yes they are remaking that one... and supposedly it's happening any minute now. The Parisian action director Louis Leterrier is helming. His last film was The Incredible Hulk so he must have a viridescent fetish. (How do you say "Orion slave girls" in French?)

09 I know Marvel and the Media have told me that I must prefer Leterrier's Incredible Hulk to Ang Lee's Hulk but I rarely do as I'm told. One reason to prefer the first Hulk (review) is that he seemed more phosphorescent and if you're going for scientific experiments gone awry which accidentally grant superhuman powers, why not saturate? Commit to the absurdity! (see also: Dr. Manhattan)

08 Buzz's run in with those squeaky aliens in Toy Story...
The Claw. The Claw is our master. It decides who will go and who will stay.
is still one of the funniest bits from any movie ever. I cherish the memory. I saw it with my brother and we had no idea what to expect (Pixar wasn't yet synonymous with instant classics). We laughed so hard that we missed the next few jokes that followed it.

07 Alligators (in general). Confession: I make a beeline at the zoo to see the alligator/crocs even though they never ever ever move. I wait and wait. They don't move! I love them onscreen even more (they move!) whether they're wrestling with Tarzan underwater, starring in comedic horror movies (Alligator) or trapped in supporting roles in cartoons (The Rescuers, Peter Pan)

06 Oola and Jabba The honeymoon was over even before the Jedi returned. Those crazy kids just couldn't work it out. She found him too possessive. He hated her independent streak. So he fed her to the rancor monster. What an a******.

05 This is more of a sideways fantasy than a reality. Plus no green-skin. There's talk of a Green Lantern movie very soon but the thing that would be brilliant that they'll never even consider doing is a hugely dense and populated sci-fi television series of Green Lantern Corps. Think of how many stories they could tell. There's more than just Hal Jordan to the Green Lantern mythos and we've got plenty of spandex single hero movies already. Try something new. The Pitch: Battlestar Galactica meets Dollhouse meets the superhero genre. Earth not included.

04 Kylie Minogue as "The Green Fairie" in Moulin Rouge! (retro) The most inspired / deranged pop star cameo ever? Maybe. Has anyone reading tried the newly legal absinthe? Did she appear to sing you showtunes? If so please tell me she knows more than just one song.

03 Yoda Make this list he must.

02 Even if I hadn't just been back to Wicked, there's no denying The Wicked Witch one of the top spots. I'm only denying her the top spot so that she'll terrorize me with an "I'll get you my pretty" or some such.



01 Kermit the Frog. The Muppets are Love.

Who would you include in a top ten green list? I admit I found the pickings a little slim. Blue is definitely more of a movie color.

previous top tens: overdue for Oscar, best TV of 2008, female directors, etc...
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