Vanity Fair's Hollywood ~ Episode 12 (2006)

Missed previous episodes? See: 1995 , 1996, 1997, 1998 , 1999, 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004 and 2005

This Hollywood history series is nearing its end point as we approach the here and now. After two relatively safe / similar Hollywood covers: actresses + gowns = glamour. discuss, Vanity Fair shook things up to instant water cooler success in 2006.

click to enlarge for maximum blinding cheekiness

Tom Ford, 44, was ditching fashion for Hollywood (his directorial debut will supposedly emerge soon), and VF had him nuzzling Keira Knightley as Scarlett Johansson languorously lounged before them in nubile albino glory. Was the empty black space to your left...

• a compositional must?
• a place in which to photoshop oneself for an imagined ménage à quatre?
• an homage to every ethnic actor they'd ever shoved into the last fold of the covers?
  

Scarlett Johansson was 21 going on 22. You're forgiven if you assumed she was the niece of not one but all of Conde Nast's top executives. Three Hollywood covers in a row! Perhaps they should just have replaced the"Hollywood" tradition with an annual "Scarlett" issue. They could document every step of her career. They could string famous actresses across the cover each year, dressed up like Scarlett Johannson's film characters.

But who would play each Scarlett?

Keira Knightley was just turning 21 and enjoying her first Oscar nomination for Pride & Prejudice. She was also promoting her second Pirates of the Caribbean and a few months away from filming Atonement. "Come back to me!" [sniffle]
*
average age: 29.
noticeably absent: Clothing. Also: Rachel McAdams, who was booked to be in Tom Ford's place but due to a "conniption of modesty" walked away leaving us forever wondering what she had planned to whisper in Keira's ear. "Come back to me!"?
collective Oscar stats before cover: 1 nomination (Keira's)
collective Oscar stats after cover: none. Keira's Atonement campaign didn't take.
fame levels in 2009, according to famousr, from most to least: Scarlett than Keira.
previous episodes: 1995 ,1996, 1997, 1998, 1999, 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004 and 2005.

don't miss the last two episodes and a possible bonus round.